Frustration

I had a particularly bad setback yesterday, after a bit of a mixed week in terms of my diet.  I'd been shopping with Dexter in the early afternoon (after spending the previous day and a half in my PJs, too exhausted to function) and he whined and begged for pats from people the whole time (this is the same after any promo event we do which involves pats from the general public).  I was frustrated with him already when I got home, but still needed to go over to Coles.  I'd bought a food processor (yes, another one; the other one died after one use) and a water filter and went to drop them in and get a new bag before heading over.

However, on our way out, rather than shutting the door for me, while I kept Fred inside, Dexter just bolted, absolutely bolted away down towards the ramp (afterwards I thought that there are probably baby possums in the trees, as it's springtime), and Fred followed him.

I had to catch Dexter first, as he's the one that can get in the most trouble when loose, and besides, he was sniffing around at the bend of the ramp, so hadn't gone far.  I did yank his lead with more force that necessary, but I sometimes can't help it when I'm really cross with him.  He didn't take any notice, though.  I clipped his lead to the fence while I tried to catch Fred, but he was already up on the top of the fence, and soon disappeared over the neighbour's carport roof.

All I could do then was take Dexter back inside, and hope that Fred would come back on his own.  I was now so angry with Dexter that I left him behind when I went to Coles, even though I knew he'd be noisy, and annoy the neighbours (not that anyone's ever complained to me about him).  I was pretty quick at Coles, as I'd only needed a few things  - but came back with red licorice, soft drink, chips and ice-cream. 

When I get that riled up I just can't seem to stop myself.  I see what I'm doing, and know that it's wrong, and tell myself that I can stop myself at any time, but I don't.

I ignored Dexter when I got home, but as I was washing my hands, he stole the bag of licorice off the couch!!  He then got put outside for a while, while I calmed down.  I actually wanted to keep the doors open, so that Fred could come back in if he wanted to, but did leave Dexter outside for about half an hour.  He was quiet, though, and was just sitting at the back door (with his nose pressed into the screen, as he does) when I went to let him in later.

It wasn't actually too long after that that I heard Fred's bell tinkling, and I was able to go out and get him.  I'd been out a couple of times in the interim, to see if I could find him - and was listening out for sounds of cats fighting the whole time - but in the end he wandered home.  I think he just comes by to check in, as he started wandering off again, but he really made little effort to run off again when I picked him up.

I felt better when Fred was back, and relaxed a bit with Dexter.  I ended up having a snooze on the couch, with Dexter behind my knees and Fred next to me.  That was very nice, and restored my mood - until the clock struck 6 and Dexter started being annoying again!

It took another half an hour for him to be quiet enough for me to get his dinner, but he was all fine after that.  I did try to get him to sleep on his bed, but it only worked for a little time.  I've let him get used to it, so it's my fault.  I don't mind it, except that now it's warmer, he's up and down through the night.

Today is a new day, though, so I will forget about yesterday (both Dexter and my diet disaster) and start over.