It will be 2 years in November since my Dad died. I think of him every day, but there are some things that bring him to the fore more than others. In particular, ugg boots, Sudoku and crossword puzzles (he taught tried to teach me how to solve cryptic clues) and growing veggies.
As I'm embarking on my first veggie garden in nearly 8 years, thoughts of Dad are inevitable. He used every inch of his tiny back yard to grow herbs and veggies, in amongst my step-Mum Josie's flowers, and even some trees, and made a tiny greenhouse out of reclaimed materials that looked like something out of a fairy story. He had a compost heap and a worm farm, and there were a couple of tortoises in there somewhere (I think there's only one now, though).
I could have called on Dad for suggestions about how to keep Dexter from eating the flowers from my plants (that's the main reason I gave up on the veggie growing!), and how best to manage my compost bins. He might even have finally persuaded me to get a worm farm going. He would have enjoyed hearing of my progress, would have congratulated me on my first harvests, and made smart and witty comments on my facebook updates.
I'll always miss Dad. He alone would have appreciated how annoying it was to have lost my favourite Sudoku pen, and I could boast to him that I can't find any that are hard enough to stump me. He would tease me for cheating at bread making by using a machine, but he truly understood what chronic fatigue felt like, as he struggled with it for decades. I can't wear my ugg boots without thinking of Dad, in the best way, and wish our winters were longer so I could wear them more.
I didn't get to go to Dad's funeral, but my sister and brother-in-law made a DVD of it for me, and sent me photos. My step-Mum consulted with me about the headstone and then sent me the final layout. I hope that I get to go back to the UK to go and see it for myself.
In the meantime, I'm going to work out how to keep Dexter from snacking on my future veggies, and I'm going to enjoy thinking of Dad while I'm out working in my little, tiny garden.
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Dad, my sister and brothers, and little Darren (who is now 11).
Dad's hand-built greenhouse is in the background. The space
behind Dad got filled up with Josie's flowers and Dad's herbs
and veg.
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I could have called on Dad for suggestions about how to keep Dexter from eating the flowers from my plants (that's the main reason I gave up on the veggie growing!), and how best to manage my compost bins. He might even have finally persuaded me to get a worm farm going. He would have enjoyed hearing of my progress, would have congratulated me on my first harvests, and made smart and witty comments on my facebook updates.
I'll always miss Dad. He alone would have appreciated how annoying it was to have lost my favourite Sudoku pen, and I could boast to him that I can't find any that are hard enough to stump me. He would tease me for cheating at bread making by using a machine, but he truly understood what chronic fatigue felt like, as he struggled with it for decades. I can't wear my ugg boots without thinking of Dad, in the best way, and wish our winters were longer so I could wear them more.
I didn't get to go to Dad's funeral, but my sister and brother-in-law made a DVD of it for me, and sent me photos. My step-Mum consulted with me about the headstone and then sent me the final layout. I hope that I get to go back to the UK to go and see it for myself.
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| Dad with baby Alex, not long before Dad died. |
Treasure the memories always and don't give up on your little garden. You can make it a sort of memorial to your Dad. And at least Dexter should be very healthy with his diet of veggies. LOL.
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